Weeds of Life
“Don’t wait for things to be simpler, easier or better. Life will always be complicated.
Learn to be happy now.
And know that no matter the time or day, it will always be now.”
Kobi Yamada from Finding Muchness
Those who know me, know my deep passion for all things garden. My love for flowers and vegetable gardens and fruit trees comes naturally to me, (if you consider that long line of farmers in my heritage spanning the plains of Kansas clear to the Rockies), but even with all those who’ve gone before me and my own years of experience, there are still numerous pitfalls; I continue to learn.
In past generations, farming was essential for survival and sustenance, as they stocked up for the dark days of winter. I’m grateful my time working in the garden is more reward than requirement, more perk than pressure. I can poke around at it without feeling so edgy about failures. I love it, despite the struggle.
It’s almost the end of May and growing is well underway in my neck of the woods. We have tilled the soil, amended the soil, planted, weeded and watered. If I’m honest, some of my seedlings are doing better than others. I learned through my research, tomatoes are pale green because they need more nitrogen, but not too much or they’ll produce many leaves and little fruit. Also, tomatoes are less abundant if planted next to potato, cabbage or eggplant, but will grow better if planted near basil, carrots, and asparagus. Even though there is a lot of trial and error, there is an art to it, one I keep trying to master.
There are so many life lessons for me in this space. For example, every time I plant a seed and see the tiniest sprout emerge through the brown dirt, it reminds me of God’s faithfulness. Or if I’m feeling impatient about prayers not yet answered, I can see how plants take time to grow and produce; it gives me a glimpse of the value in waiting. Tending to the plants is a clear parallel to tending my own soul. I must constantly cultivate, plant, water and weed!
Oh the weeding!
Weeds are trouble. They may appear with pretty flowers but if left unchecked they’ll take over a garden and choke out the plants, vegetables or the fruit you want to grow. As pretty as the blooms might be, weeds are bad news in the garden, just like weeds in our life. Weeds must be addressed quickly or their roots get stronger and more intertwined with the plants we want. How easy it is to just grab at the weeds and break them off, so at least the surface of the garden looks well-kempt. But everyone knows, unless the complete root is eased out of the dirt, the weed will return within a short time and we’re right back to where we started.
What I learn while I’m out there digging weeds, watering and building supports for plants, is to be consistent and deal with my own weeds quickly and make sure I have a good support system in my life. We know we all have weeds in our character which need to be pulled. Doing so keeps the weeds from tangling with the good character traits for which we strive and that matter the most.
What are your weeds?
Is discontentment, anger or jealousy giving you trouble? Or what about the weeds of unforgiveness, are they choking out an important relationship? Maybe impatience or procrastination are all entangled with the roots of diligence and persistence. Could the weeds in your life be things such as over-concern with outward appearance or competing with the talents of others? Might they rob you of joy and meaningful friendships? Has the undergrowth of self-righteousness or arrogance crept in and insinuated itself alongside your kindness or benevolence?
If you feel unsure which weeds are present in your garden:
Pray for clarity. Ask God to show you what has entangled itself in your heart.
Write down on paper what is buzzing in your head. Writing in a journal/notebook gives any fear, pain and anger a place to be outside of your mind (so it won’t destroy the inside). Adversely, when you express joy and gratitude you’re able to see the good in ink! Give it a try.
Take a walk. Clear your head and consider areas of struggle. Also, remember to assess parts that are strong. Find joy here. Thank God for the good he’s put in you.
Ask a trusted friend to tell you what they observe, or, if you are blessed to still have your mom around, ask her. Generally, you’ll not hear something you don’t already know, but if you do, consider it honestly and take necessary steps to get rid of it!
Don’t freak out when you find those tangles, faults and missteps; just like in the garden, you get to work! Once it becomes clear, choose one area and start to work on it. For example, if you become aware others feel neglected due to the time spent looking at your phone, set a goal to not pick up your phone for certain amount of time. If you realize you’ve allowed a habit of complaining to develop, train yourself to state three positive areas of your life every time you’re tempted to complain. This may help you become more grateful overall.
Here are a few tips that may help in your physical garden AND in your spiritual garden.
Take small steps, weeds flourish only if allowed. Address them.
Don’t give up. Sometimes I’ll spend a couple hours weeding a garden bed and am amazed just one to two days later, there are new weeds poking their heads up out of the soil. Pesky.
Pay attention! Weeds thrive on inattention! Do the work - reap the benefits.
Don’t ignore weeds and hope they will go away on their own. They will not. As Emerson wrote, “Go often to the house of thy friend, for weeds choke the unused path.”
Plant and grow healthy plants. Help those roots grow, focus on them. Remember, roots take time. Roots are God’s work. We may not see what happens below the surface, but we tend to the plant and trust the deeper work to Him.
Remember, weeds are easier to grow than flowers. Don’t get discouraged when you must keep working to remove them. In my first book, Three Little Decisions, I wrote about battling procrastination. “Healthy habits develop when we consistently act on the right things. The positive results of those daily decisions are incalculable.”
Every one of us who desires to have a “healthy garden'' will face weeds and storms and slow growing plants. Our decision to focus on the right thing, to persevere and make small steps does matter.
“Seed that falls among thorny weeds is like those who hear God’s teaching but they let worries, riches and pleasures of this life keep them from growing and producing good fruit. And the seed that falls on good ground is like those who hear God’s teaching with a good and honest heart and obey it. They produce good fruit.” Luke 8:14-15 (NCV).